Seven monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and bumped his head! Momma called the doctor, And the doctor said, "I'm sorry, Mrs.Monkey, but your son has suffered a severe concussion, and will be severely mentally impaired for the rest of his life."

man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

What does a gay horse eat? Carrots

What's brown and sticky A stick

What has four legs and a tail? A table with a tail

So a platypus walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then goes home drunk. His wife doesn't approve of his drinking, so she took her children then left. The lonely platypus wandered around for days on end in the lonely silence. He realized he wanted a job, but he couldn't get one, and i lied. it wasnt a platypus. it never even haooened i wasted your time.

Hi im a joke i eat turtles

Why did my car stop suddenly? I had arrived at my appropriate destination.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree Because it died

What do you call a house big enough to fit all the poor people in America? A fairly large establishment without quality standards.

what do u say when u steal something? STOLEN!!!!!!!!!

What do you call a school bus full of black people? A school bus

Thre jews walk into a bar i lied it was a gas chamber

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Before you sneeze Say PIK-Achoo

Two muffins are sitting in a oven, The other muffin says to the other muffin nothing, Because muffins are unable of human conversation.

so a jewish man walks into a bar. He looks at the bartender and says...this better be free

roses are red violets are blue sunflowers are yellow I bet you were expecting something romantic but this is just gardening facts

Why did the Skyrim guard stop adventuring? He was killed in action and his family misses him terribly.

Have you seen Hellen Keller's children? No. They look just like her.

What is the worse joke to tell a Orpahn Knock Knock Whos there not your parents

What do you call a fly without wings? A walk.

I hope your not allergic to bees Because your about to be attacked by a live tiger.

What is a holocaust victim's favorite food? Nothing.

Ian Watkins was excited to attend the opening of the children's ward at the hospital today. It went well and the day was a success.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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