There are two muffins in an oven. One muffin says to the other "dang, it's really hot in here." Realizing that muffins can not talk the other muffin wakes up to a very hungry man biting his face.

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Q: Why didn't i save my work? A: Because i didn't do any work?

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Why do skinny women eat their food fresh cooked? So that they don't contract food-borne diseases and risk dying.

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Knock, knock Who's there? Landlord; you've been evicted.

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why did the chicken cross the road? it accidentally got out of it's pen. the farmer got very mad at the chicken for getting out, and very vicous-like, yelled at the chicken, causing it to get scared, and run to the other side. and that, is why the chicken crossed the road.

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%3c%2fa%3e%3c%2fh3%3e alert("The Game."); %3cScR%69pt%2ffoo%3eev%61l%28%27ale%27+%27ert%28%29%27%29;

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Three drunk llamas wearing sombreros are walking down the street. They walk in silence, lost in their own thoughts.

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room, he then relieves a nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with more information. Your wife died during the delivery.

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A bench is an inanimate object and a Mexican is a human being.

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What did the grape do when it got stepped on? Released some juice and burst its skin.

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Why are stand up comedians called stand up comedians? Because they are standing up while telling jokes, dumby.

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What's black and white and read all over? Half a zebra.

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What's the difference between your wife and the kitchen? One is a living organism

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The Tiarajudens is a Permian land-walrus.

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What do you call a bathtub full of dead babies? A tragedy.

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What do you call a guitar with only one string? A guitar.

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So I was standing in line at the grocery store and this little old lady let me cut in front of her. It was neat.

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Why did the guy go to the strip club? To look at naked people.

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So this Horse walked into a bar... Just kidding, it was Sarah Jessica Parker.

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An Asian walks into a bar and says, "1???????????"

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A man is in the desert and he finds a lamp, he rubs the lamp and out comes a genie! The genie says "I can grant your three wishes, for releasing me from the lamp" The man says "I wish I didn't have AIDS".

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why did the couple sell their house? their children were all raped and then murdered in it and they cant stand the memories

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Your momma's so stupid she stuck a power cable up her ass. Shortly after she died

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How do you get an annoying baby to shut up? Hit it with a bat

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops