Friends are like balloons When you stab them they die.

knock knock go away

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I don't know why.

What do you get when you mix monster, coke, and and seltzer? Kicked out of stop and shop.

Britney got to the top of the building. What did she do next? She jumped off to end her miserable life

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Jews are human beings. Pizza is a type of food.

Inbreeding is really funny if you think about...

Dude man, I'm high...

Knock Knock! Who's there? The police, your father just died in a boat accident.

A kid walks into a bar, everyone fled the bar because they were all afraid of goats

Why did the girl fall out of the swing? Because she had no arms.

Q:Whats rhe best part about spinning a baby round and round Stopping it with a shovel

A white man went to the basketball court to play basketball and was confronted by a group of black men. They kindly invited the white man to play basketball with them and they had a nice day

What's a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick

Knock knock! Who's there? Girl Scouts selling cookies! I'm not legally allowed within 500 yards of you. Please get off my property.

There was a boy named Steven, a son of a rich business man. Steven was an interesting child though, as he always kept care to one of his possessions. That possession being a plain, old, brown box. On Steven's fourth birthday his father said he could have anything in the world he wanted, just name it. Steven said he wanted two quarters to put in his box. The father agreed and gave his son two quarters to put in his box. Every year the father would say he could have anything he wished for, and Steven just asked for two quarters. Nothing more. On Steven's 18th birthday he got into a severe car crash. The father stood over the hospital bed where Steven lay. "I can get you the best doctors in the world. They can save you, please let me get you this for your birthday!" The boy shook his head. "All I want is two quarters" Steven replied. The father was distraught. "Son, tell me why you've wanted these two quarters every year you have been alive instead of anything else in the world". The boy complied. "Fine I'll tell you." Then Steven died before he could tell the father. The End.

There is a high speed pursuit when suddenly the suspect's car skids out of control and crashes into a field. Two cows witness the commotion, when one turns round to the other and says "Moo"

Why did litltle Susie drop her ice cream? She got hit by a bus Knock knock Who's there Not Susie

Biggest lie in America: Sorry, that was my last stick of gum.

Q: How many Babies does it take to paint a garage? A: babies do not have good motor skills therefore, they can not hold a paint brush.

What ryhmes with turtle? räpe

Why did a homeless man eat another man's face off? Because he was hungry.

what do you call a black man in the bank holding a bag of money. One wealthy man

Roses are red So are you Cause you killed my dreams So I killed you

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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