A horse walked into a bar. The bartender asked: "Why the long face?" The horse said: "My wife just died."

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I was walking down a railway line the other day... I was fined £1000

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why did the black man cross the road? to get away from the racists

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Why didn't the cat eat its dinner? Because I nailed its head to the floor.

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Say the line below all very fast to get sudden strange sensation... Magic-ish. I like to find threes and peel of their... BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK... ...BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARK! Done? Now sit Down, have a little treat Good boy/girl! :Look well at the sun, the jagged Blackness will consume all, Your little star forever but a ever fading memory.

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You do realize that in my home dimension of earth, I am just lying in the sun, typing on the goddamn laptop right? I mean are you retarded OR SOMETHING? I AM THE GODDAMN MORAL MAN! Moral: Honestly though, If I where like running around shouting this, I... Would begin to get slightly worried...

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Why did Jane break up with DeShawn? Cause they grew apart

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-Why did the jewish man chase after the penny? -Because he's poor and needs to feed his starving family.

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How do you make a unicorn? Jab a stick through a pink horse and name it Liam

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What's the difference between a pizza and a girl? I've stuck my penis in a pizza

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We are few Nero, too few, if I want to split my money with you, would it help you find true happiness?

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple Getting raped by a hose

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roses are red violets are blue wanna hear a joke? WNBA....

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my rhyme is sicker than the holocaust

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Why did the wheel fall of the car?? Cause you can't fit 10 pancakes inside of a doghouse.

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Why did Shakespeare die? It's called life.

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What's the difference between Megan Fox and a dead baby? I'll eat Megan Fox before I fuck her.

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How do you make a blond cry? Rape her and kill her family.

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Q: How many Jews can u fit in a bathtub? A: Well it depends if you use their ashes.

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James got up from the couch, forgetting what he got up for he asked his girlfriend, Mary: "What did I get up for again?" Mary replied "To get your medicine for your amnesia."

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why dont black people celebrate thanksgiving? kfc is closed on holidays

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Knock Knock........wait there cars gone, I'll come back later

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Kade was sad. He had finally got a girlfriend when he realized he actually liked men.

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An alligator walks into a bar. The bar tender calls animal control and calmly escorts everyone out the back door.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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