What do an eagle and a mole have in common? They both fly, except for the mole.

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so a man walks into a store looking for a new sheet,the cashier he goes to is chinese He leaves with a new sheet and is satisfied with it,oh wait,he gave me a pile of shit,sorry guys i had to -chuckles

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Chuck Norris was so good at karate that he held the middle weight world title for 6 years and was named fighter of the year by Black Belt Magazine. He also used his talents to start a successful acting and advertising career.

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Q. Why did Sally fall off the swing? A. Because she had no arms Q. What smells like red paint and is blue? A. Blue Paint Knock Knock? Who's There NOT SALLY

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A man sits down to dinner with his wife And she notifies him that their 8 year old son just died

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Listen Nero, you are the only one I suspect right now, how do you know all of this? Why should I believe you?!

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man1:did you know hellen keller had a dog? man2: no man1: neither did she

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Hey Patrick what am i ? Ebola No im Texas! What's the difference?

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the bible

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Knock Knock! Who's there? My arm! My arm who? My arm is everywhere!

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What did Jean Luc Picard say to Data when he saw a broken Janome Overlocker? Make it Sew

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what's worse than dropping half your sandwich? Getting hit in the face with a sledgehammer

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Q: Why is there never sun beaming at the castle? A: Because the castle is full of knights.

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Hey, I just met you And this is Crazy I have Amnesia I like trains.

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I like to rape children, then kill them, eat them and defecate them into a toilet

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What did one cow say to the other cow? Moo

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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Your mom is so fat, she went to the hospital, and they intern, turned her exess fat into 12 babies.

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Why was the girl-scout crying? I hit her in the knee with a baseball bat.

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What's worse than AIDS Nothing can possibly be worse than finding out you have AIDS

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Q: Why is 6 afraid of 7? A: 7 is a registered sex offender.

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What's worse than rotten eggs? Being dead.

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Q: How much old could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck Wood A:10.6 cubic metes

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What happens when you ask a blind guy to drive you somewhere? What happens if you ask a blind guy to drive? You will end up in a four way accident with 8 people dead 2 of which children and 1 baby. You might survive but the blind guy won't so you will have to go to court for him on the issue. You realize that you are terrible when it comes to the law and you get yourself thrown in jail for 2 years. When you get out you are so tired of getting butt raped that you go out and do it to someone else. Then you go back to jail an the process repeats it's self because this is the American justice system. We could work on it a little bit. But yeah, don't ask a blind guy to drive, your butt says thanks.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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