What green and eats rocks? Grass, i lied about the rocks

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Where do cows go to have fun? Cows don't have a concept of fun as such, but they would probably go to a large, sunny field full of lush, green grass with a bubbling river and plenty of shade.

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Chuck Norris doesnt eat honey, hes allergic to it.

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Why couldn't the pirate play poker? Poker is a tricky game - maybe he'd never been taught how to play.

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What does Mitt Romney approve of flip flops? They feel good on his feet.

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How do you kill a priest? Shoot him in the forehead.

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-How do you kill a douche? -You stab him untill he cries out in mercy and stops moving.

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your period is red your waffle is blue find a way to fix it or no sex for you!

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What's the difference between a pizza and a girl? I've stuck my penis in a pizza

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What the flower say to the bird. Nothing

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Guess my favourite fruit. Peach.

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what does the monster eat after going to the dentist? the dentist

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why was the little boy screaming. he realized he was an asian

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What do you get when you cross a dog with an anteater? An animal unlikely to survive beyond infancy.

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What did the Dad say when his daughter murdered everyone Tea you're grounded

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What's black and breaks your stove when falling from a tree? Your stove

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what is the difference between two trees? it doesn't matter because motorcycles don't have doors

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Rebecca Black walks into a bar. The bartender refuses to serve her because she is not yet 21.

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That's about as suspicious as a nun doing squats in a cucumber field.

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why did the child kill his mother because the child gave his mom AIDS

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What gets louder as it gets smaller? A man in a trash compactor.

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Once there was a ugly barnacle. He was so ugly, everyone died. The end

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Where will you be in twenty years? Celebrating the twentieth anniversary of reading this question... unless you're older than 60, which by modern life expectancy, you'd be dead.

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What does a black guy get for Christmas? Everything you own

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops