Why did the man open up a umbrella? Because it was raining..

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What do you call a bright orange fish? A gold fish.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A joke.

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what does a baby sound like in a microwave. i don't know i was masturbating

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Why was Allen late for work? He was mauled by a bear. Allen is dead.

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How many men does it take to change a light bulb? None, there is nothing wrong with the light bulb.

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Christopher Reeve walks into a bar.

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Why did the white girl lose the race? The girl that she was beating was black and her boy shot her. Therefore the black girl won.

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that wall over there ->

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Why did the boy cross the road? He was visiting his dying grandmother at the hospital.

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In space, no one can hear you scream. Which means Xenomorphs are deaf.

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The little girl asks her father "Daddy why is santa fat?" "you have to exist to lose weight" he answered

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A man walks into the doctor's office for an appointment. The doctor performs the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's genitals to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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Knock knock. Who's there? 9/11 9/11 who? You said you'd never forget!

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Calling your penis a chose because it's small and fat.

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- Mom, you have a banana in you ear. - Son I can't hear you, I have banana in my ear.

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Your momma is so ugly... Yeah, yeah, yeah my momma's ugly, but guess what, at least I'm not an orphan asshole.

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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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Whats green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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Why did the little boy sit next to the big boy? Because he wanted to get raped by big Jake!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it felt like it.

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A program that creates "pointless inventions" and posts them at the wrong sections.

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Roses are red Violets are violet Jesus Christ how dumb can you get.

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How do you get rid of herpes? You shoot up the cancer ward of a hospital.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops