Why did the car cross the road? Isn't that what cars do?

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't get back up? She had no legs.

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Why did the pedophile go to the park? He lost his dog.

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A horse walks into a bar, it broke both its legs and was then put down.

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What do mermaids wear? Nothing. Mermaids don't exist

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None of the sex jokes are not funny or not funny. They're just inappropriate.

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if life gives you lemons, you have some lemons

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What's white and looks like paper? Paper

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a guy named bob likes sprinkles on his ice cream.

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Im 8 years old, sometimes I get sick, and I take medicine and it makes me feel better. My daughter has cancer.

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Whats the difference between me and a ghost? What? Ghost are not dolphins

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A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

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Your mom is so fat that she has to wear larger clothes than the average person.

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knock knock *opens door* WE DON'T WANT ANY!

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If you have $5 and Chuck Norris has $5, Chuck Norris now has $10.

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What is funny? Your football official having a heart attack

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Why did the skeleton not get invited to the party? because he was dead

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you need 2 pple for this. Ask me if im a tree? Are you a tree? no

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Whats worse than getting broken into by a robber? Looking at Obama

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What's worse than getting in a car accident? Being turned into dust and swarmed by bees while on fire

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knock knock. who's there? no one. no one who? no one who?

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Q.Whats the difference between a black guy and a bench? A.One is a human and the other is an inanimate object used to give people a rest.

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I like doodle. XoXo Jamie

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My daughter's so smart, that instead of texting K, she writes Potassium.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops