What's worse than a baby in a dumpster? A baby in two dumpsters

how many jews can you fit in a car? 2 in the front and 3 in the back depending on how many people decide to go

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead.

Q. What do you get when you mix eggs, mashed potatoes and salt? A. A pretty good batter for mashed potato pancakes.

What was Mozart's favorite vegetable? Aspara-gus.

Whats worse than the holocaust? Sex with helen keller.

Q:whats big white and falls out of trees A:a refrigerator

National security?

What's worse; twelve babies in one trash can or one baby in twelve trash cans?

Why didn't Superman save the people from 9/11? Because he was a quadriplegic.

Why did the 3 legged dog fall over? Because it was knocked over by a passing pedestrian.

Knock Knock Who's there? Kevin. Kevin who? Kevin Smith. Oh yes, Kevin Smith that lovely boy from just around the corner! Come on in!

Knock Knock. READ THE DAMN SIGN IT SAYS NO SOLICITORS!!! ... yeah.

Q: Where was Moses when the lights went out. A: In the dark.

Your name is Fired, your Boss comes up to you and says "Your Fired" You say "I know my name." Your boss gets mad and throws you in a chimney

Why did the man commit suicide? Because all meaning in his life were gone.

Q. why did the chicken cross the road A. damn it this joke is a million years old shut up

What's a worse place to be besides the friendzone? On your grandmas lap crying because your parents just died in a car crash.

What did the fat kid get for Christmas? Diabetes......

My brother is crazy... crazy like a fox! I caught him eating a Possum on the side of the road yesterday.

Why did the patient die of aids disorder? Butt sex. Lots and lots of butt sex.

what do you call a blind man who buys a caller i.d.? handicapped

Why from a friends phone? I demand a full explanation, here, you got my number, you got my home address, and who the hell was that crying little bitch on the phone? I got friends in the UK which owe me some money, and nothing to lose, if I have to take care of you before you take care of me and even possibly my wife in the crossfire, I will take you down and everything in my path! Moral: Got ya!.

Read in a Jersey accent: SOOOOOO my friend __________ saw this coffee shop in new jersey! He was like.... i love coffee why dont they give it to me for free???? The man at the coffee shop Killed me! that is why coffee is not free!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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