Life is like a box of chocolates, some are brown, and some are white.

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Why didn't the boy get a bike for christmas? He broke the bath tub.

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Why did the Chinese man fall down the stairs? He was shot in the face.

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What did the snowman say when winter was ending? -Nothing you dumbass

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Q: Why didnt jim win the race ? A: Because he swalowed his tounge.

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What do you call a boy with no arm and no legs in a fire? Screwed.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Deez nuts Ha goteem

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What is white and re(a)d all over? White paper that is dyed red.

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What is pink, red and silver and crawls into walls? A baby with forks in it's eyes

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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What did God do to help the little girl with terminal cancer? Nothing, God doesn't exist.

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How do you make a girl scout cry? Kill her family.

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Why do cows say moo? Because it's a cow

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How do you stop a baby from crying? Douse it in gas and throw it in a fire

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yo mommas so fat she heard it was chilly out so she ran inside and got a bowl

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- Why an Asian crossed the road? - Because he wanted to.

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What do the holocaust and new born babies have in common? Nothing. Except some babies are born in Germany.

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what did the women with no arms and legs say to her daughter? go to your room.

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Your mom is so old, she was able to have children around the time you were born.

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How many black babies fit in a garbage can? It depends on the capacity of the garbage can.

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Your mom's so fat that she is going to contract heart disease by age 30.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Yesterday i had a conversation with my husband. I asked him if he slept with another women. He said yes

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How did the man eat 100 mints in one bite? I'm not sure myself, but we can agree on one thing, his breath is gonna fresh.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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