How do you stop a baby from crying? Put it in the microwave

How do you piss off a lion? You repeatedly poke it with a stick.

A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: ''Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!'' The woman gets off the bus and files a complaint with the public transit system and the driver loses his job.

What did the man say to the other man? Nothing, they didn't know each other..

Fred awoke and looked outside. The sun was rising over the fog in the valley below. Birds were singing, and the air smelled of freshly cut grass. THIS was the day, Fred thought, that I'm going to kill my wife and kids.

Whats a cat? A cat!

Hitler. lol, sucks.

A black person in the NHL

Knock knock Who's there? Happy 9/11

What do gay horses eat? A combination of straw and legumes, much like heterosexual horses do.

why do black people were white shirts?..they feel like it

why do you often see black man dating fat chick?? because they have the brains to realise that fat chicks are just people and need love too

What starts with "p" and ends with "orn" Popcorn

A man cries out to god.. and god doesn't answer.

A Pole walks into a Pole. They chatted for a while, talking about the good old times they had had together in Poland. They soon finished their conversations, and went seperate ways.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have AIDS, Now you do too!

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

Poop.

Why didn't Hellen Keller just wear glasses? Oh wait

What do you call a half man half manatee? A manatee

What did the abortion clinic serve at the cafeteria? Fetus soup

what is white and red all over? a ginger

I like turtoes.

Why do they call it lunchmeat? Because it is meat that you eat at lunch.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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