The bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

Roses are gray, violets are gray, everything's gray, bitch im a dog.

Knock knock

Why did the chicken cross the road? Since chickens cannot speak, it is difficult to say.

Have you tried Honeybunches of Oats?

how do you get a cow in the fridge? Open the fridge, and insert. How do you get a kangaroo in the fridge? Take the cow out and insert What animal is not in the lion king? kangaroo --WHY hes still in the fridge

What happens when a girl falls? Another girl pees her pants

P0P T4Rt

Oh my god, I'm on fire! Help me, help me, oh God it's everywhere!

How many fingers am I holding up? None, my fingers were blown off by a hand grenade.

So a baby seal walks into a club.

Jesus wept.

What did the baby say to the banana? -- "mama!"

how did the fat guy fall off the swing? the chain on the right side broke because of is eccesive weight that he probably should have lost last year on biggest loser.

shook hands with Marty ,talked about politics, then walked away.

What did the boy reading a book do? Run into a pole.

Whats black, and chrispy inside...? A black guy with bonecancer

There's two bears in a bathtub, One looks at the other and says "hey can you pass the soap?" the other bear says "what do i look like a light bulb?"

If you live in the 'living' room, what do you do in the others? You die.

what is white and red all over? a ginger

What's better than group sex? Gang rape

Will you marry me? I'm an atheist. ,.

Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

what did the schizophrenic get for his birthday? new friends

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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