a mother cow walks up to her three child cows. the first cow asks: "mom, why am i named rose?" the mother responds with: "because when you were a baby, a rose petal fell on your head." the second cow asks: "what about me, mom?" the mother says: "when you were a baby, a daisy petal fell on your head." the third cow says: "AAAAOOOOOOAOAOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO!" the mother screams: "SHUT UP REFRIDGERATOR."

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what would you get if you combined a sixth grader with a machine gun? A homophobe

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A man walks into a bar. He asks for a beer. One of the bar tenders twlls him they are all out. He takes out his gun. He has 1 bullet and there are 3 bar tenders. He wants to kill them all. What does he do? A: Shoots 1 and pegs bricks at the other two.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he wanted to prove he wasn't chicken

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Q:Why did Santa, the tooth fairy, and a rich man jump out of a plane? A: On Christmas Eve, a rich man was skydiving and lost his tooth as he plummeted towards the beautiful plateau.

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whats the difference between a jew and a boy scout? - The boy scout comes home from camp.

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how fast does it take to kill a blonde? Give me a gun and i will find out

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust What's worse then the Holocaust? Two Holocausts

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Q: What's worse than losing your job? A: Seeing your entire family die in a car accident

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Bill is driving along the Interstate.All the sudden, a refrigerator falls off the truck in front of him.The fridge slams into Bill's car.He dies instantly.

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? You wouldn't be able to count them if it were dark.

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What do you call five gay men walking in the same direction? I don't know the usual human does not take note of such circumstance.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby dressed as a clown.

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Twas brillig and the slithy toves did gyre and gimble in the wabe, all mimsy were the borogoves and the momeraths outgrabe

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Three penguins sitting in a tub. The first penguin says to the third penguin, "Hey would you pass the soap?" The penguin in the middle says, "What do you think I am a typewriter?"

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Dave:Hi Mark:Hi

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Whats the difference between a jew and a canoe? Canoes weren't killed by Hitler

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How do you make a clown stop laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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Why did the Football Coach go to the Bank?? To Cash his Paycheck.

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Why did the black man enjoy KFC. Because like many foods, it contains monosodium glutamate (MSG) a flavor enhancer that makes many foods taste better. It however had nothing to do with race or cultural background.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was making a suicide attempt.

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What did the us reporter say? nothing as his head was in a isis members bin

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Why are lawers are so scared of Jerry bryant? Because he bites

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I've got a fever, and the only prescription is more ibuprofen...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops