A blonde is walking down the road, and she sees a sign saying STOP. She carries on walking. As a pedestrian, the sign does not apply to her.

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How can you tell if a dog is under your chair? Look under your chair

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Why did Anti-Joke.com close down? It didn't. If your reading this, the site is fully operational and up to date with your system.

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Q: Whats black and hangs from a tree???? A: A tire!!!!!!!!!!!

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What do a squirrel and a grape have in common? They are both purple except for the squirrel.

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What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A co-pilot

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Not your cheese.

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A dyslexic walks into church and asks the priest. "Father is there a dog."

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A man walks into a bar and notices a twelve inch tall man playing a small piano. He asks the bartender about it. The bartender explains that the pianist has worked there for some time, mostly performing on weeknights. The bartender also tells the man that he may be suffering some vision problems, as the pianist is about 5'8" or 5'9". Some time later the man visits an optometrist and finds out he has a severe case of astigmatism. "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "I already asked ''Banana who?'' Is that your real name? Who is this really?" "Knock Knock." "You are upsetting me. I am calling the police now. Please get off my property."

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A woman walks into the kitchen to see her husband cooking dinner because gender stereotypes have been dead for years.

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why did the girl slap joe? he had a boner.

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Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

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If Chuck Norris has $5, and you have $5, Chuck Norris still has more money than you.

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Why was the dentist sent to jail? Because he committed a crime.

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Why did the man drown in the bath? He was a quadriplegic and couldn't support himself above the water.

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What colour is chocolate? Brown.

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Why did the black man steal purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon? Because it was the birthday of his 8 year old daughter with autism and she loves purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon and he was very poor and wanted to make his little girl happy for once.

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Why did Lisa spill her drink? Her plane crashed.

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What is the difference between a group of magicians and a cheerleading squad? One has a cunning array of stunts.

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The man said to his wife love hurts. the wife then progressed with punching in the face.

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Why did the man scream? He got shot in the eye with a nail gun.

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Why didn't Katie cross the road? Because she's dead.

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''I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu.''

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Pickles

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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