Q: Who was shot 50 years ago? A: Abraham Lincoln was shot 50 years ago! (=

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I need a way to meet local babes and get ripped in 4 weeks. Shame there aren't any popularly advertised methods of doing that around here...

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What would the Swatch be called if it was made by a Croatian company? A Crwatch.

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What did the nun eat for breakfast? Baseballs.

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Why did Sarah fall of the swing? Because she was very careless and swung too high.

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What's big, blue, and eats rocks? A big blue rock eater.

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Q: GUESS WHAT IS REALLY BAD????? A: TITTY CANCER! :0

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Well I do want it to end now but...WHAT? How did you get that trough? I thought hypnosis was supposed to increase awareness and focus.

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what is the worst thing a bout four black men driving a Cadillac off a cliff? they were my friends

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pants on the ground pants on the ground lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground

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Q: How many different Pokèmon are there? A: Pokèmon aren't real.

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Color Blind people are so stupid that they can't even see color. I've been seeing color since I was a small child. They are so stupid.

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How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

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Why do black people always sit in the back of the bus? There aren't any available seats in the front.

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fallow me on twitter #ieatveloceraptorsfordinner

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What do you call a black person flying a plane? A pilot.

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why didn't the boy go to school because he died last night

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DEAD ON KANE ITS BEEN ALL YOU ABD CAOIMHIN

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Atheism

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A man walks into a bar. Since he was only moving at a slow walking pace, he was fine, no further events worth noting occured.

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The teacher asks Timmy "why is your cat at school today?" Timmy says, crying, "Because I heard my daddy say to my mommy, 'I'm going to eat that pussy when the kids leave.' so I'm saving him!"

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand and says nothing to the man running the stand. Realizing that the duck might potentially keep patrons from approaching the stand, he packs up and moves elsewhere.

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What do you get when you skin a potato? A screaming kid with autism and no skin.

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Why don't birds cry when they get hurt, lose a loved one, or watch opera? How the f*** should I know.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops