roses are red violets are blue i suck at rhymming you have nice boobs

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Q: How do you keep a blond occupied for an hour? A: You write "flip over" on both sides of a blank piece of paper.

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How many tacos does it take to feed an angry person? You better tacover it!

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What do two black guys do when they walk into the convienent store with masks? Buy candy for Trick-or-Treating

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? A hurt animal that should promtly be taken to the RSPCA for surgery.

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Hey Johnny what's after 2?? 3.

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What's hard, long and screws a blond? An IQ test.

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How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two but I don't know how they got in there.

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What is white and shaped like a refrigerator? A refrigerator.

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What do Helen Keller and Beethoven have in common? They both died wondering what the hell their last words were.

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What's pink, bubbly, and goes round and round? A baby in a microwave.

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Theres a blonde and a brunette at a party. The redhead is left out because she has no soul.

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Why was the black family eating KFC? Because KFC tastes very nice and there was a discount on the family bucket.

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Why couldn't kitty drink it's milk?\ It's face was nailed to the floor

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Why is elmo sad? He was brutally raped by Dora :D

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your momma's so fat that she weighs a lot

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Why did the man buy his wife expensive flowers? It was their anniversary and he is a faithful husband.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Orange ya glad i didn't say banana

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What does a sailboad and a walrus have in common? Nothing.

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A guy walks into a bar, has a drink then leaves.

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What do you call a sober man driving a car? a designated driver

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Yo momma's so poor, she needs to work 2 jobs to support her family.

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What do you do to a woman who has a black eye? Punch her in the other eye so that they match.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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