I was typing a new book today (literature wild west, and I realized I had been writing the same shit over and over again for eight hours and was dead tired when It went so..) Welcome to the wild west, guns! Hayballs! MONSTER TRUCKS! And then I kinda thought to myself... Is it just me or am I trying a bit too hard? So guys? What do you think, am I trying a bit too hard here? Funny story, I am tired and drank lots of coffee, so I am holding back in order to not try so hard... Not trying hard enough to hold back? I am asking you! WHY? BECAUSE YOUR ANSWER DOES NOT MATTER! ARE WE GAME?

An obese man walked into McDonalds and ordered 6 Big Macs. He proceeded to walk to a booth in the back corner and eat them all. Turns out he was white.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have to use the bathroom.

Q. What do you call a dog thats deaf? A. A horribly abused domesticated animal that needs a kinder owner.

How do you treat someone that is feels like a total failure? Treatment: Okay, draw a square on the board over there, but in order to succeed, you must fail at it. Patient one: Oh, I drew a cicrle :( Patient two: I drew a square :( Congratulations one you succeeded at failing! Now get outta here. Congratulations patient two, you succeeded at the given task, bye bye.

Your mother is so fat she has to have her clothing specially ordered, this brought her to a massive credit card bill and made your entire family bankrupt.

Relax and enjoy sugartits, you see, I left a last chance for you to shut down the function yourself, when you really want to end it sugartits, you can just read and focus on what I am calling you, sugartits, it really insulted you at first sugartits, but do you see it? Have a nice night sugartits, I mean I sleep like half a hour luckily because of hypnosis and the time control and you know stuff that sounds like its from Sonic or you sugartits. But I gotta go dear sugartits, you want to hypnosis to end, you make it happen by focusing on what I am calling you here.

Why was Chris crying? There was a robbery at his house and both of his parents were brutally murdered.

what do you call a young man? a little boy

My girlfriend told me "Give me twelve inches and make it hurt" I ejaculated prematurely and fell asleep.

Shea's sty....

A man walks into a library looking for books on poor punchlines. The Librarian directs him to the appropriate section.

What's black and white and read all over? Half a zebra.

Rex Ryans foot fetish was honer by Mark Sanchez when he threw the ball at his teammates feet.

Whats worse than ten babies stapled to a tree? One baby stapled to ten trees.

Your mom is so fat, when she farts, I can use her underwear as a hot air balloon

What starts with p and ends in orn? Popcorn

Equal rights!

What do you call a guitar with only one string? A guitar.

I need a side cart on my motorcycle just for my diick

Doctor doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains!" "Never-mind that, you've got AIDS.

Beached whale: "Look at me, I'm a land mammal"

joe: guess what. Bob: what. Joe: nothing I just wanted to talk

A man walks into an insane asylum and says hello-The inmates assault him with mindless babble. A man walks into an insane asylum and says argblthenthrozaphowea-The inmates say hello.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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