There were once three brothers who were traveling along a lonely, winding road at twilight. In time, the brothers reached a river too deep to wade through and too dangerous to swim across. However, these brothers were learned in the magical arts, and so they simply waved their wands and made a bridge appear across the treacherous water. They were halfway across it when they found their path blocked by a hooded figure. This hooded figure then proceeded to step out of the shadows and mug them, all three of them were brutally murdered. This is why you stay away from hooded figures when you are being talked about in a story being told in third person.

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where would you find a blind man's car? exactly where he left it...

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What's the opposite of white? Black. You're racist. You fapped.

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Obama stumbles upon a KKK meeting. All the klansmen shake his hand and respect him because he is the President.

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Whats funny about a man in a pink leotard ? Nothing infact i think he's very brave

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What did Jesus say when he was nailed to the cross? Please, not the nails.

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What did one wall say to the other wall? Nothing. Walls are inanimate objects and thus incapable of conversing with one another.

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A man quites his job to open a coffee shop which has been a dream of his for years, The shop does well with a healthy supply of customers and a steady income,The man is now financially stable.

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What's the difference between a piano and a goldfish? One's a piano, the other is a goldfish.

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What's the same about a duck-billed platypus and a duck? They both have a duck bill on their face... Duh!

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how do you make a plumber cry? pull up his pants....

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His name is Frosted Mike, and he neither has nor does not have a penis.

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What happens if you an 3ft size olive, a glob of red paint and rainbow colored glue on a table and rub your arm in it? You get olive, red paint and glue on your arm.

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Jesse likes to jack off and lick the white stuff off of his balls and digest it

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Why does Tim Teblow love men? Logan Cole told him to.

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Q: Why does the blonde have the biggest tits in the third grade? A: Because she's 21

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If I was in a room with Osama bin laden and george bush, and my friend. And I had a gun with two bullets, I'd shoot my friend twice.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The electrician, I'm here to fix your door bell.

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what happened to the man that no one cares about? No one cares

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Me: Ask me if I'm an orange. You: Are you an orange? Me: No

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Why'd the girl fall off her bike? She rode over a curb

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What's better than "Friday" by Rebecca Black? Hitler's kill/death ratio

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Roses are red Violets are too I am color blind How about you

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y does byonce sing to the left? because black people have no rights

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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