What's a pirate's favorite letter? R, but they are also fond of the C.

Three construction workers are sitting on a beam high in the air, getting ready to eat their lunch. "Hey!" someone shouts. "Get down from there! That's a safety violation!" So they do, and instead they eat their lunch on the ground.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He realized he was in the ghetto

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Shoo! Shoo! Get out! Hey! Who's horse is this? I don't want a horse in my bar!"

What do you call a Mexican named Chicee? Chicee

How do you keep Helen Keller distracted? Find a stimulating device that blind and deaf people can operate correctly.

On the fifth day of Christmas my true love brought to me Nothing, because we only celebrate one day of Christmas

What is worse than a worm in your apple? The holocaust

Why do we have a black president? Because the populace voted and thought him to be an overall better candidate than John McCain.

How do you occupy a blonde for a day ? You put her in a round room and tell her to sit in a corner. ... That or you strap a bomb to her, give her a list of twelve billion things to do, and tell her the bomb will explode if she doesn't do everything on the list.

Penis.

"Ask me if I'm an orange!" "Are you an orange?" "No."

What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs are both the same.

a man walks into a bar and dies

three men walked into a bar, the fourth one ducked

Two muffins are in an oven. They turn out delicious.

What did the black person say when his white friend said "Nigga!"? "You know, I really don't get racist jokes like this."

What did the boy with no arms get for christmas? Prosthetic arms.

Why did the catholic priest go to jail He was a paedophile

Why do blacks have a little white on their hands? God has always said that everybody has a little good in them.

Scenario: 2 people are in a desert. There is only 1 bottle of water left to drink. Who drinks it? Neither of them, they drink the gallon bottle of gatorade instead.

does your face hurt? yeah, neither does mine.

A black kid, an Asian kid, and a Jewish kid walk into a barrier. They are students at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry and they walk straight through the barrier onto Platform 9 3/4.

Why is justin bieber gay? because he is attracted to men

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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