Roses are red, violets are blue, I have to go to the bathroom

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Why couldn't the teenage pirate get into the movie? Because he lacked the required money for the ticket.

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So coool! How did you do that dinosaur!?

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I would tell you a joke about a pencil but there would be no point.

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Why did the black man repeatedly punch the white man? The two men were boxers. They were fighting in a charity boxing match. Revenue generated by the event went towards cancer research.

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If I said you had a beautiful body would you stop asking me if those jeans make you look fat?

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Why did the boy loose his glass with milk? He got hit by a bus.

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0 1 this is a sad sad world.

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woman's lacrosse

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Why was the blonde confused? Because someone was dressed in a chicken costume throwing pinecones at her.

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why did the chicken cross the road? He saw his family getting murdered and tried to stop it but got hit in the process

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What noise did Helen Keller make when she fell out of the window? None. She wasn't aware that she was falling and died immediately upon impact. @rowakaflocka

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What can little Billy play? The tumour, sorry I meant what will little Billy die from.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple in your worm.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped.

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Where did Sudie go during the bombing? Everywhere.

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What did the pig do when the farmer died? He just stood there cause pigs are stupid.

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What does a black guy get for Christmas? Everything you own

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What's green and eats rocks? A green rock eater What's purple and eats rocks? It hasn't been discovered by science yet...

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What would Marylin Monroe be doing right now if she was alive? Clawing her way out of her coffin.

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THEN WHO WAS FONE?

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roses are blue violets are red dont judge me

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why does her hair shine so nicely? she uses good shampoo.

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Oh please! Come on! Those that got to us where mostly Russians remember? And what where my parents? (if you do not know you might have guessed it by now) I found a guy that looked about the same as me, messed him up and put my jacket on him, I do not die that easily. Anyway, id explain more, but I have been without these fucking painkillers so long that I am talking trash on this stupid site again... Seriously the pain I am used to, but this addiction on painkillers is a bitch... (shedog if censor got a hold on it) But it turns out I cant sleep without them, sleep just does not come anymore, so Ill go get some now. Who are you by the way? I am Nero7, Aka Axel Knight.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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