Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I like to sniff your hair when you are asleep.

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When did the Chinese guy go to the dentist? At the correct time he had been allotted.

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Why don't blind people own cats? They do, who told you that?

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Knock Knock, Come in.

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Man 1: youre going to die Man 2: why? Man 1: everyone dies

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A bench is created to be used by multiple people for sitting down or other forms of rest, and does not have consciousness or the complex body systems of humans and other animals.

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There once was a man from Peru. Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. Then he woke with a fright In the middle of the night And thought about what a strange dream he was having.

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What did the man say to the man? Awkward.

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i came... i saw... -myself when i came.

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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: ''Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!'' The woman gets off the bus and files a complaint with the public transit system and the driver loses his job.

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how do you tell a joke on anti-joke? you don't.

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Q- why are anti-jokes funny? A- cuz

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'I had a surprise test today.' 'What happened?' 'I was really surprised.'

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left him.

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if i'm white and you're white, then who took my car keys?

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house knock knock Who's there THE CHICKEN

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares?

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A unicorn is walking down the street and a man asks him: "Why so horny" The unicorn then slap the man upside the head because that was none of his business.

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What did one snowman say to the other? Hmm...smells like carrots.

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How did the blonde die? She got slurped up by a 1,000-foot anteater. How did the 1,000-foot anteater die? He got slurped up a 10,000 foot anteatereater. How did the 10,000 foot anteatereater die? It doesn't matter. The Earth just got slurped up by a one-trillion-foot planeteater.

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Whats the difference between two flies? Nothing, they're both flies.

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Father: Son stop masterbating u might go blind Son: But Dad I'm over here

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How do you know if a Frenchman has been in your house? You could ask a neighbor, or check to see if anything has been missing, or set up a camera. There are actually many ways.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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