Q. What's large, solid, and full of veins? A. A man or woman who frequently engages in weightlifting and follows a diet primarily based around high protein and low carbohydrate intake

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Why did the baby die? It got shot.

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knock knock who's there? no one... your lonely so you hear things

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Why was the mother crying Her son was killed by a meteor

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how much does a pirate pay for an earing? $2.50

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Whats the difference between Michael Jackson and an avacado? Michael Jackson molested a 12 year old boy

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what did the little girl find when she opened the freezer in her basement? food.

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A guy vociferiously kills another person- fueled by the incentive of personal gain provided by his rapacious, human nature. He is an army soldier who's triumphant in battle and hoping to recieve a promotion. However, ultimately all he did was essentially insignificantt and his acts of purported valor were diametrically unnoticed by all except for his closest friends/allies. He never did supass his original self of a soldier and died of a natural cause that was disclosed only to the members of his immediate family.

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Past, Present and Future walk into a bar. It was tense...

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A man walks into a bar and the the llama next store sprouted wings and flew Then a potato says hi to a iPod but unfortunatly the iPod can't talk. Meanwhile hello kitty and ducks wage a nuclear war and the rise of ostriches Started. The a giant cucumber started falling of mt. Everest and killed many Flying platipuses were saved. Then aliens started invading and the world ended.

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Two men walk into a bar, the third man ducks.

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KNOCK KNOCK. who's there? Isdar Isdar who? Isdark in here.

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What do Kenyans do at night? Starve.

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Whats the difference between black and white? nothing,because in art they are just shades.

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Why did the Booger cross the road? because He was getting picked on....

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How did the kid drop his ice cream cone? Ans. He got hit by a bus

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I went to see a fight and all of a sudden a hockey game broke out.

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Yah? Well your a ********

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first muffin turns to the second and says "it sure is getting hot in here!". The second muffin looks over and responds "this makes no sense - we shouldn't be capable of speech, let alone self-awareness." "We probably should try to get out of here, though."

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what happens when you wake up inception

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Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

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What did Tarzan say when he took out his knife? I took out my knife.

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Where you last put it.

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What is the speed limit in front of Liberace's house? 40mph because that portion of the road is curved.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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