Friends are like potato, when you eat them die.

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Knock knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant.

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I was eating a sandwich when someone came up to me and said "sharing is caring" So I gave him a grenade He asked "where's the pin" I said " I pulled it for you" This is not an anti joke

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Knock knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant.

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What did the white guy say to the two black guys? I like oreos.

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Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

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Whats worse than suicide? death

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Suicide Johnny and the Go Kill Yourselves

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Knock knock Whos there A dead boy a dead boy who A dead boy who started tobuy drugs and didn't have the money for it and his family loved him and he was going to go to college

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A man goes into a bar. He leaves drunk and beats his wife to death and burns the house and kids.

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Why couldn't Suzie ride the swings? She got hit by a refrigerator.

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Are you from Africa because YOU GOT AIDS

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I had 99 problems Solved them all

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four blondes where on their way to disneyworld they see a sign that say disneyworld:left so they turn around wondering where disneyworld went

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The Morman Religion.

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Roses are red, Violets are purple, not fucking blue.

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Mr. Wonder, optimism is seeing the glass as half full, pessimism as seeing the glass half empty, and realism as not seeing the glass at all.

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Two scientists walk into a bar. The first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have H2O too." The bartender gives them both water, realizing that H2O2 is poisonous and that the second scientist must have simple worded his request poorly.

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I once heard a funny joke, it was as funny as a funeral

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Why do so many people like writting really bad anti jokes? Said Santa Claus

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Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Enough.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was forced to against his will by a group of marauding ninjas who happened to be strolling by at the time.

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You know why Michael J. Fox makes really good milkshakes? ... because he uses the best ingredients

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How did the Jewish man play racquetball? With a racket and a birdie.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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