What did the mother do when she found out the baby was stillborn? Gave it a proper burial, grieved for months and became a shell of her former self.

like this or you will die at some point in your life

What did the homeless man get for his birthday? AIDS

“Before I know it, he’s got both of my hands in his viselike grip above my head, and he’s pinning me to the wall using his lips … His other hand grabs my hair and yanks down, bringing my face up, and his lips are on mine … My tongue tentatively strokes his and joins his in a slow, erotic dance … His erection is against my belly.”

What happens when a girl sticks her head in a birthday cake? She gets a toothpick stuck in her eyebrow. Trust me..I know.

q. What's the worst thing about your family a. There related to you

How many Jews does it take to change a lightbulb? Depends on how big the lightbulb is

how does your hair keep changing lengths? due to my countless hours of grueling sessions in chemotherapy due to what was recently found as a terminal cancer, i wear wigs

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because the mas of the ice-cream gathered up enough potential energy to increase the velocity of said ice cream making a mess on the ground.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

You want some cake? Sure! Okay, go buy the ingridients and bake me some. YAY!

TOYS TOYS TOYS IN THE ATTIC

Why did the woman call 911? Fire.

What's the opposite of Christopher Walkins? Christopher Reeves.

A duck walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender serves the duck the beer. Later, the bartender wonders to himself when his life got so out of control.

charlie sheen becomes sober.

why did the chicken cross the road? because the 99p mcdonalds mayo chicken was popular in the coop.

ur gey

What's the worst part about a plane with 500 people in it crashing? It might leave a dent in the ground.

Curiosity killed the cat, Oh wait, I thought the dog did.

What's the difference between a trash can full of dead babies and a Porsche? I don't have a Porsche in my garage.

A white guy, spanish guy, and a black guy jump off a roof. They were all killed on impact and their families will mourn their loss for years to come.

What happened to the child who's mother drank and took drugs while she was pregnant? Dead.

WILLY

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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