Why did man lay down? His dog ate his genitals.

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Why couldn't the girl eat her pizza? She had no face.

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Why did blonde cross the road? She needed to get to work.

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A man is walking down the street and sees a women sat on the pavement crying, he walks over to her and asks "what's wrong?" to which the women replies "it doesn't matter" the women then walks away as she did not want to share private information with a stranger.

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Ring Ring! Hello? Hello, is your refrigerator running? Yes it is Good.

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What did the bartender say when the black man walked into the bar? Hello, what would you like to drink?

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Jim Jim who? Oops, wrong house.

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What did the Little 8 year old boy do when a big black man walked into his house? He said "Hi daddy", then they happily ate dinner together.

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What gets you a succesful life and career? Swag

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I <3 Hitler

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How many people buried in a cemetery are dead? All of them.

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Where does Elmo live? In Sesame Street.

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roses are red violets are blue clean up that **** or no sex 4 u

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Why did the man fall over...he had a stroke!

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what did the penis say to the vagina? SMACK SMACK SMACK

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A girl and her friend got into a fight. They both bled to death.

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A guy walks into a bar. NOT!

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Jesus, Mohammed, and Moses all walk into a bar. They sit down at a table and glare at each other before turning to watch the baseball game. They support opposing teams.

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What is Hellen Keller's favorite movie? Around the block in 80 days.

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What's love like? Some people say it's like a lotus flower, others say it's like an orchid... Personally I'd like to say it's like a fire at the bottom of you're soul-- like when people sin and go to hell... that fire burns forever???

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What did the ocean say to the beach? Nothing. The ocean is inanimate and therefore incapable of speech.

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Why did the man jump into the river? He wanted to go for a swim, but the pool was closed, so he swam in the river.

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whats worse than one bee sting? two bee stings whats worse than two bee stings? the halocaust whats worse than the halocaust? three bee stings

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What is brown and lives in a toilet? A black homeless man

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops