Why did the cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the third cat fall out of the tree? It was tied to the second cat. Why did the fourth cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the fifth cat fall out of the tree? It needed to get down, but couldn't find any other way down. After he fell, he was minorly hurt and ate some cat food.

Why did the pigeon rape itself? It had mental issues.

What does a dyslexic person call God? Dog

knock knock. who's there? Ida Ida who? Idanno, don't ask me.

How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A wood chuck CAN chuck wood, that's why his a wood chuck.

What is E.T. short for? He has small legs

a child and his father were on a bike ride the child tried to cross a street but was run over by a truck. His father now lives homeless and griefs his dead son.

What's worse than being a Jew in 2010? Being a Jew in 1942.

Yo mama so fat, when she went to a party, they took the apple from the roast pig's mouth, and they put it on her mouth.

What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? They may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

Arent you my dark knight in black armor, you would seriously put your life on the line for my sake?

A black man without problems.

What did the snake say to the rat?

9/11

how do you get a girl to stop ignoring you? you kill her family with her watching.

So its 1945, and these two blonds walk into a bar....I forget the rest of the joke, but Japan ends up getting nuked.

What did the boy reading a book do? Run into a pole.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To kiss my ass

Why did the little girl jump off a cliff? because she was at a cliff jump at a water park

I heard the new Batman movie was to die for

Last time I heard that I dropped my i-phone

What do you call a pencil made entirely of steel? I dont know, i dont name my pencils.

A man was chopping wood, he then brought the wood to his house and lit a fire.

When did the Chinese guy go to the dentist? At the correct time he had been allotted.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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