Your mama's teeth are so yellow, she decided to invest in a teeth whitening procedure and begin a healthier dental hygiene regimen.

What happened to Kim when she went swimming? She didn't, she doesn't know how to swim.

What did the three-leaf clover say to the four-leaf clover? "FREAK!"

A baby seal walks into a bar. Animal services are called and the seal is returned to its natural habitat. A man then beats it dead with a blunt object.

Person 1: Your Ugly Person 2: Your mom's ugly

What do you call an Iraqi man steering the plane? a pilot, you racist.

how many Alzheimer's patients does it take ti screw in a lightbulb? to get to the other side

roses are read violets are blue u suck and ur gay

Q: whats worse than a worm in an apple? A: being raped by a giant scorpian

What did the baby get for his 1st birthday? Nothing, he was a Harlequin baby, therefore dying during the last stages of pregnancy.

Are you from Tennessee? Cause Jamaican me crazy.

A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and a mop.

How do you drown a blonde? Keep her head under water for 2 minutes because thats when the human brain starts to loose oxygen.

Why is Jesus not real? Because Chuck Norris is still alive.

Three guys and 4 Catholics are in a bar. They guys are making a joke. The first one says I'm gonna go to Oregon there's no Catholics there and the second one says I'm gonna go to Ohio there is no Catholics there and the third one says I'm gonna go to Alaska there's no Catholics there and one of the Catholics walk up and say how about you go to hell theres no Catholics there.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because someone was chasing it.

Q: Why is 6 afraid of 7? A: Because 7 rapes people

Hey! i just thought of the funniest joke! okay so it goes like this: A man was walking down the street and saw a bar... he walked in and.... yeah, thats about it.....

Q. What red and scratches glass A. a baby in an oven

How do you keep your dog warm? Put antifreeze in its water dish.

How do you kill a clown shoot it in the face

You're on fire.

How do you stop a baby from crying? Put it in the microwave

What did Tarzan say when he say an elephant coming over a hill? Hey look, there's an elephant coming over a hill!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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