What do you call a watermelon in Africa? A watermelon.

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why am i so pretty? because god blessed me with good looks

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How many dyslexics does it take to screw in a light bulb? Dyslexia is a cognitive learning disability characterized by the sufferer's inability to fluently spell, speak and read. Being a intellectual disability, the chances that dyslexia could impair the practical functionality of a sufferer are very slim and hence it it is highly probable that it would only take one dyslexic to change a light bulb in the simplest of conditions. However, to definitively answer this question, I would have to know a range of variables such as the height above the ground at which the light socket is mounted, the physical height of the dyslexic, the voltage and amp characteristics of the light-bulb itself, the physical well-being of the dyslexic etc. These variables are unknown, are not mentioned in the initial question (as is common for this type of question) and hence, I cannot answer this question to any degree of accuracy.

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"I see" said the blind man to his dead wife

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Knock, Knock Open the fucking Door

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Why did the cheeseburger have seeds on its buns? Because it wasn't a taco.

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What did susan boyle say when she saw a 10 year old boy get hit by a bus? "OH MY GOD, SOMEBODY RING AN AMBULANCE"

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Why did the girl fall if her bike? -she has no arms

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What's the difference between a baby and a pineapple? Pineapples were not shot by nazis during the holocaust.

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why did obama become president? people voted 4 him.

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What did the mexican say to the other mexican? Hola.

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A skeleton walks into a bar. It's inside a person. He orders a beer and enjoys it contentedly.

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Someone thought that an onion was the only food that made you cry. So I threw a watermelon at his face.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road A: Nobody cares because its a chicken

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How do you kill a clown shoot it in the face

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Why did the boy pick up the baseball? He wanted to play baseball.

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A dog walks into a bar. A patron checks its tags and promptly calls the owner.

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What did the homeless man get for christmas? Nothing

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What has two arms, and two legs but cant walk? A Cripple

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A: Knock, knock. B:Who's there? A: It's your neighbor, Sam. B: Oh, well my extended family is over for dinner at the moment. Would you mind coming back later? A: I suppose that would be alright.

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Yo mama is so dumb, she makes blondes look smart!

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whats the difference between a mexican and a black person? They have different skin colors.

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That awkward moment were your giving your girlfriend a blowjob then you realize your giving your girlfriend a blowjob.

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how do you own a ginger? you don't nobody wants them.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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