An alien, a midget, and a Jew walk into a bar... I forget the rest but your mom's a whore

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Finding this website has distracted me and has taken up a large majority of my time.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a registered sex offender.

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What's black when its clean and white when its dirty? A black guy that rolls in flour.

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If you're jumping rope, and both the tires are flat, how much frosting would it take cover the staircase? Rocket!

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was dead.

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what did the guy think who woke up with his hands and feet nailed to a barn. IS THIS BECAUSE IM BLACK!

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What happened to the man who jumped off a building? He got hit by a bus on the way down.

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What do you call an Aboriginal in a yellow sleeping bag? An organised man, ready for the harsh winter ahead.

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Why didn't the priest move in with the two rabbi? Because having three adults between the ages of 18 and 65 occupying the dwelling would have violated their insurance policy.

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Whats the difference between wayne rooney and shrek? Well, one, shrek is fictional. Two if he was fictional,he is green. Wayne rooney is not green. Three wayne rooney plays for a football team, surely shrek has no idea what football is. The list goes on.

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How high is the sky? True or False

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A man is unemployed, ugly, short, fat, smelly and stupid. That's what she said.

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What's green and smells like a dirty whore? A dirty whore

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What happens when a man goes to college? He gets a degree and graduates most of the time or he fails miserably.

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Whats funnier than a massacre? Everything.

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A blonde and a brunette are walking down a street. What a great way to parade and recognise the various colours that lie upon ones head.

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jingle bells jingle bells,, bells were jingled!

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A Frenchman, an Irishman, and a Russian walk into a bar. The Frenchman orders a glass of wine, the Irishman orders a whisky, and the Russian, who prefers to be sober, orders a glass of water. They have an all-around pleasant night, yet they leave the bar upset. Why? A severe water contamination in the town resulted in the Russian man consuming a fatal dose of arsenic.

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Roses are blue Violets are red I got this backwards Carpets are nice

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What's big, red and delicious? A prune. I lied about it being big, red and delicious.

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A pirate walks into a doctors office with ship's wheel attached to his crotch. Pirate: "Arrrrrr, do ya accept Kaiser Permanente?" Doctor: "Yes, but there's a $20 co-pay."

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Which came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither, many scientists believe that the first living organisms on Earth were single-celled, prokaryotic bacteria.

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Why didn't the plane crash... because of the wight male piloting it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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