A man walks into a bar with a chicken on his head the bartender asks the man why do you have a chicken on your head the man replies the chicken is thirsty

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side -Tag

I Have A Dog Named Woof Woof A Chicken Called Clucky A Cow Named Moo And A Pig Named Oink Lol Jks I Was Talking About My Wife

What can be said about a high school drop out who is 30, lives with his mom, and plays WoW all day? He is probably a very high level mage

What do you call a house full of Mexicans? A house

Why did the old man cross the road? Coz he was in an ambulance

What do you call an Asian man without any clothes on? -naked

Why was the student late for class? Because paraplegics can't drive.

What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a Ferrari? I ain't got a Ferrari in my car.

You Scream, I Scream, The cops come, It's awkward

Want to hear a clean joke? Soap.

A man walked in the kitchen with a gun. He made a sandwich.

Yo momma's so ugly that she could not find another partner after the tragic death of your father

Why did the... Timmy, your mother and I are both tired.

Boys have swag, real men have class

A man walks into a bar and orders 12 shots. "8?" Asks the bartender, to verify he had heard correctly. He feels unsure of giving the man 12 shots but does so anyways due to his financial situation and he hopes for a generous tip. Afterwards, the man kills 9 people in a car crash due to his level of intoxication and the bartender seeps into depression due to his feeling of guilt.

Knock, Knock! Go away!

What do you call a person who drinks beer a lot? Alcohol abuser.

A mountain goat walks into a bar, the bar mans asks ''so, what will it be?''. The other customers question the mental integrity of the bar man, as goats cannot talk.

Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

Q: What do sleeping pills and coffee have in common? A: Absolutely nothing

What part of a vegetable are you not supposed to eat? His wheelchair.

Why did the black man cross the road? To get to the chicken!

God is like semen. They're both nouns.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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