You bumder!

Knock Knock whos there? Semore Frickelson Semore Frickelson Who? What other Semore Frickelson do you know!? Let me in its freezing out here!

what do a blonde and a brunette have in common? They were both red-heads until they walked into great clips.

I used to be an adventurer like you, but then I was raped by a giant scorpion...

,Do you know what hapened to the janitor who cleaned the school halls? He finished the job, got paid a reasonable amount and went home to his average family.

How do you kill a blonde? Tell her she can breath underwater.

A black man, a small child, and a priest were all standing in line. They were all checking in the hospital after being in a 3 car pileup

Why didn't the cat eat its dinner? Because I nailed its head to the floor.

Roses are red, Violets are blue Poems don't have to rhyme

Your momma so poor, she has a hard time paying her bills.

what do you call a woman who has sex for money? smart.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He lost his punch line. -by Ross

Why isn't Michael Jackson aloud at Disney world? He is dead.

You know what makes no cents? 100 cents because 100 cents make a dollar.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like saying the colors of flowers, Delphiniums are also blue.

A man is on his way home from a business trip and walks into his house. He is quite as to not wake up his wife or kids. He gets to the bedroom to find his wife in bed with the neighbor. He is shocked at what he came home to and decides to file for divorce. She was a stay at home mom and loses everything because of the divorce. The man woke up from his horrible nightmare and kissed his wife on the cheek. She has always been faithful. He decides to tell her about the dream and, for insurance, emphasizes the part where she loses everything in the divorce. They happily live out the rest of their lives together.

Why did all the boys come to my yard? Because of My milkshakes

whats the difference between a mexican and a bench? a beanch can support a family

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have amnesia! Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have amnesia! Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have amnesia! Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have amnesia......

"What would Jesus do?" "Form a religion, get nailed to a cross, and become a martyr to millions."

What's short, white, and is sick and tired of your shit? A toilet. What's white and killed Elvis? Also a toilet.

How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because her family lived in the countryside and her family's income was very far below average and in the time of her miraculous breakthrough, automobiles were for the wealthy families and obviously her family was not wealthy. She wouldn't have been able to drive even if she wasn't blind or def. The economy pretty much hated her and her family.

A Mexican, Asian, and a black guy are on a bridge, the Mexican says there is too much rice and throws some off the bridge, the Asian says there are too many burritos and throw some off the bridge, the Black says there are too many candles in his house and throws his car off the bridge. Everyone was happy and left besides the Black because he threw his car off.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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