why did the chicken cross the road? does a chicken have to explain everything it does?? do u explain to everyone around you why you're crossing the road every time?! i think not!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q:Why did the black man fall down? A: he got hit in the face by a refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Guess whats in my hand. Can you guess? A gun. Bam bam, you're dead. Haha

thumb_up thumb_down +3

wife: why are women's feet smaller husband: so they can stand closer to the kitchen sink

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Knock knock Who's there? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense. Not the case here, though.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What is a turkey? The offspring of a turtle and a monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What worse than being shot? Waking up and finding a penis in your mouth.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the sadistic farmer with a loaded shotgun (as the farmer has an extremely large score to settle with the chicken, as his wife was dead, a cause of mad cow disease, an STD from the chicken, as the chicken is a pimp) thus escaping captivity and starting a new life as a free chicken. God save Martin Luther KIng

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What has one head, three eyes and seven legs? A cow with a tri-pod rammed up it's arse. The third eye is a result of a birth defect.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

I beheld M.Bison/Raul Julia, as I fell down from the sky LIKE LIGHTNING! Your friendly r*pist Moral Man: You don`t like me? MAAN That gets me on... As for Horny, I was born with two of them... The third is a burning stake. ...So you like me... Meh! No fun when they don`t struggle nor squeal, even if they do scream in pain...

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why was Hellen Keller afraid to answer the phone? This situation is impossible because Hellen suffered from scarlet fever, therefore she could not see or hear the phone.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs, consdiering as disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion)

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A horse walks into a Bakery and asks "Do you have any wheat bread?", and the Baker replies "No, we only have white bread." So the horse says: "Thats okay, I rode my bike today."

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the black man go to Jail? He was visiting his friend!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

/\ The joke above was really dumb. \/ The joke below is pretty good.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why can't Chuck Norris divide by zero? Because it is impossible, the answer is undefined.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why was the Asian girl doing a math problem? It was her homework that her teacher assigned her class.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet You have pancreatic cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why do They call a horse a horse? Because They speak English.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Whats more dangerous then a man with a gun? two men with guns.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why are black people afraid of tigers? Because tigers eat people

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q: Why did the cheerleader drop her pom-poms? A: She was knocked unconscious from behind and repeatedly sodomized by a convicted rapist.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops