What's brown? My toilet hahaha

thumb_up thumb_down -65

I heard the new Batman movie was to die for

thumb_up thumb_down -67

Once upon a time there was a very lonely man. He was kind, strong, handsome, smart, and basically everything that was good and that a girl wanted. Well, one day, through all his immense loneliness, he decided that it was time that he got into a relationship. Knowing that he deserved a competent and pure woman, he went to a local church to search for his perfect match. That night, he took home with him the most beautiful and purest of all the women in the church, brought her to his room, and whipped out his junk on her face.

thumb_up thumb_down +60

When did the Chinese guy go to the dentist? At the correct time he had been allotted.

thumb_up thumb_down +58

Knock Knock, Come in.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A bench is created to be used by multiple people for sitting down or other forms of rest, and does not have consciousness or the complex body systems of humans and other animals.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

There once was a man from Peru. Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. Then he woke with a fright In the middle of the night And thought about what a strange dream he was having.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

why do women have small feet. so they can stand closer to the sink

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What did the man say to the man? Awkward.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

how do you tell a joke on anti-joke? you don't.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's the number one killer in America? Death.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: ''Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!'' The woman gets off the bus and files a complaint with the public transit system and the driver loses his job.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Noses are red, pilots are blue I am dyxslexic boo who

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting attacked by an evil demonic llama.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house knock knock Who's there THE CHICKEN

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left him.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Knock knock

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's better than winning a gold medal in the paralympics? Walking.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A unicorn is walking down the street and a man asks him: "Why so horny" The unicorn then slap the man upside the head because that was none of his business.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How did the blonde die? She got slurped up by a 1,000-foot anteater. How did the 1,000-foot anteater die? He got slurped up a 10,000 foot anteatereater. How did the 10,000 foot anteatereater die? It doesn't matter. The Earth just got slurped up by a one-trillion-foot planeteater.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did one snowman say to the other? Hmm...smells like carrots.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Whats the difference between two flies? Nothing, they're both flies.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How do you know if a Frenchman has been in your house? You could ask a neighbor, or check to see if anything has been missing, or set up a camera. There are actually many ways.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why is Six afraid of Seven? Because Seven is a horrible pedophile and has deeply seeded emotional problems

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops