"What starts with an 'F' and ends with 'uck'?" "I don't know, what?" "'Firetruck.'"

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Did you hear the one about the spoon and the dis running away while the cow jumped over the moon, IMPOSSIBLE! eating material such as the spoon and dish are inanimate objects, and cows cant jump for they weigh from 600 to 1000 lbs.

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knock knock whos there cops o shit come on they found out about pot lets go

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A deaf man is listening to the radio. Think about it.

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What do you call an blonde, brunette, and a redhead? There has yet to be a definition for a group of people categorized by hair color.

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poop

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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A guy walks into a bar with a Donkey and a jar full of pennies. He walks up to the bartender and orders ten shots of whiskey. He was found dead the next morning from erotic asphyxiation.

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What does the president and the prime minister of china have in common, Sickle cell anemia. 342

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did you stub your toe?

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A car walked into a bar... wait no it didn't it has wheels.

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What's the same between a bike and a duck? They both have wheels. Except for the duck.

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What do you get when you don't wear protection? A baby.

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A baby walks into a bar and the bartender says.... Where is your mom?

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Have you seen stevie wonders new house No Neither has he

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whats the difference between a black guy and pizza? a pizza can feed a family.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill To fetch a pail of water Jack fell down and broke his crown and Jill called the paramedics

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Why were 50 police officers in the supermarket? A tsunami had struck and they were cleaning out hundreds of bodies

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Justin Beiber

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Why couldn't the girl call her boyfriend? Because she is homeless and can't afford to buy a phone.

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roses are red violets are blue you little stupid a*s b**ch i aint f***ing with you

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Why did Suzy fall of the swing? She didn't have arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzy.

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* two sisters are making yo mam jokes* * mom turns around* mom: Hey yo mama so stupid ... sister one: ummmm.... sister two: sure thats not you?

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? "I'm going to kill everyone you've ever loved you fucking cocksucker, you think you can get away with sleeping with my wife? You better think again kiddo I will take away everything from you until you are reduced to a smoldering ruin of what you once was, mark my words bitch."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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