wat does say to another bird....... chirp chirp

What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: He has a debilitating disease, it's called ALS.

What do you call putting a toad in the microwave? Animal cruelty.

Why can't you teach drivers ed and sex ed at the same time in Iraq? The camel would get tired.

Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? You're in-laws. Bet you wish I said banana

Blonde Girl: Why is this green-painted man throwing forks at me?! Green-Painted Man: It is confusing you, no?

Knock knock. Who's there? Chet. Chet who? I probably shouldn't be giving you my name, just get in the fucking van...

Whats the leading cause of death Life.

what's more interesting than capital gains tax? (there's no answer)

A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve you kind here." The black man says, "Is it because I'm black?" The bartender replies, "Yes."

josh Roberts you speccy CUNT

An Irishman, a Zimbabwean and a South African walk into a bar... oh wait, it's just the English cricket team.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was clumsy.

How did leatherface cut a tree when he lost his chainsaw? He just asked a friendly neighbor to borrow him a axe

So a Jewish Family wakes into a German Pizzeria. They were very satisfied with the service and ended up tipping the waiter 20%

roses are red violets are blue this verse doesn't ryhme and neither does this one

Johnny: One day dad i will be tall like you! (Later that day johnny was found dead in a garbage bag)

What is a kangaroos favorite desert? The outback

2 men were in a bar, One was talking to the other, "I was walking down the street someone fell." "ha" "isis it true?" "What" "isis" and a bomb went off and they all died

people say thers saftey in numbers, try telling that to 6 million jews

How to trick hundreds or religious people to drink cyanide? You establish a religious community in which you establish a ritual of drinking Kool-Aid once a day and one day switch the Kool-Aid with cyanide.

List of people I love: Hitler Stalin Mussolini Ted Bundy Charles Manson Hannibal Lecter Vladamir Putin Satan Justin Beiber One Direction Chris Brown Chris Brown's parents Oh, and my mother. I love my mother, too.

What's the difference between an apple and a black person? Well theres a huge difference but they both taste good in peanutbutter

Whats green and red, in a ditch, and has cookie crumbs all over it. The girl scout i ran over with my car.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...