What do you call a man whos had his arms ripped off in front of you? An ambulance, because with an injury such as this, you can die anywhere between 10 and 45 minutes

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was strapped to the first monkey.

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Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

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Q. What's the best thing to do before you get in a car accident? A. There's actually not much you can do in a car accident, considering you probably will never expect it, and it happens relatively too fast to react.

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You may notice something very odd about this paragraph. There is something strange although you can't figure it out. It is boggling your mind and keeping it from thinking of the real purpose of this paragraph. It is like an enigma in an enigma in an enigma in an enigma. Stop thinking hard and think inside Da Box. I just wasted your valuable time although it's not really valuable if your looking at this website.

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Theres this black guy who goes to a gun shop and buys a .45 and then goes to get a permit and uses it responsibly....

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What do you call a schizophrenic Clown surrounded by 10,000 Amish gangsters, all armed with dildos? I don't know, but it would be a heck of a sight, wouldn't it?

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A Black guy and a Jewish guy walk into a bar. What does the black guy say to the Jew? "Hi".

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I'm so hungry I could eat a horse and chase the jockey.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme. This one doesn't.

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Your momma's so fat: She feels uncomfortable in public due to current trends in ideal body shape and aesthetics of beauty.

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If i had 100 dollars for every time a black president was assainted i would have 100 dollars in 4 months and six days.

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Q.-What's the difference between broccoli and a dead moose? A.-Yes.

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So, a man walks into a bar. His alcoholic habits are slowly tearing apart his marriage.

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How do you get a blonde to tell time? By asking her what time is it.

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Why are ginger's jokes not funny? Because they're gingers.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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I wanted to burn alot of calories so i found a fat kid and set him on fire. :3

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What red, white, and blue? A white person who was raped by a clown.

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No antijoke here.

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Whats fun about having sex with twenty six year olds? Theres twenty of them

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What do you get when you cross a crocodile and a couch? A coat because vests don't have sleeves.

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why did Michael Jackson cross the road? He didnt he is dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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