What's worse than being a Jew in 2010? Being a Jew in 1942.

69.... is a number

nik nak paddy wack give the dog a breathalyzer test

a child and his father were on a bike ride the child tried to cross a street but was run over by a truck. His father now lives homeless and griefs his dead son.

knock knock who's there? Tommy Tommy who? Tommy Smith from across the street, i just ran over your dog.

"Doctor, doctor! I think I've got Chlamydia!" "Yes, so you have told me. The urine sample you provided me with last week has come back positive. I'm sorry, sir, but you'll never be able to have children."

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a snake in your liver. Because that could be hazardous to your health.

Poop.

How do you drown a blonde? Keep her head under water for 2 minutes because thats when the human brain starts to loose oxygen.

A baby seal walks into a club...

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

why was the man sad? His mom was killed in a car accident. His wife commited suicide? His kids were drowned in the bathtub by their mother before she commited suicide. But he was sad because he forgot to take his depression medication.

what did Tyrone get for Christmas he got shot by isis

I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

What did susan boyle say when she saw a 10 year old boy get hit by a bus? "OH MY GOD, SOMEBODY RING AN AMBULANCE"

Whats red and is bad for your teeth? A brick.

knock knock who's there? no one... your lonely so you hear things

why couldn't max ride his bike? because max is a goldfish.

Q: What did the bulbasaur say to the charmanderr?? A: bulbasaurrr

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where is my tractor?"

How do you make a little girl cry? Throw a brick at her face.

Three construction workers are sitting on a beam high in the air, getting ready to eat their lunch. "Hey!" someone shouts. "Get down from there! That's a safety violation!" So they do, and instead they eat their lunch on the ground.

Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell into the mud.

Your mom is so fat she has type 2 diabetes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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