a: How can you tell you are not pregnant? b: I don’t know. a: Like this: I’m not pregnant.

The joke below me is retarded

SOCIOPATH SAYS: Bitch, rate all my comments thumbs up, if you do I wont rape you... YOu know unless I feel like, women kinda like it when men are in touch with their feelings... SO yeah... Im gonne touch your feelings ;) Nah, nope, no homo, you a gal? We can meet! Voluntary rape! (No I did not say voluntary sex, rape, you can say the saferword: OMG SO GOOD HARDER HARDER! If I you know... Am about to kill you... Which I will do if we get to that stage anyways... Relax ill recycle you. Moral: NeroMetal Think Recycling! Save our planet! ITS LIKE RAPING AND KILLING A PERSON!

What's sad about a house on fire?, it was my house.

You are such a loner nothing even clings to you, not even plastic wrap!!

I can see you under there. Under what?

What is as dry as a bone? A bone

A baby seal walks into a club.

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left him.

Ross Tumilty is gay 8===D

A horse walked into a bar, broke its leg and its owner then had to put it down because it was a racing horse and the owner did not have enough money to bring the horse back to health. Fuck you.

if a black man, a Chinese man, and an Indian were about to jump off the Eiffel tower, who would hit the ground first? who cares?

what do you call a man with a mop? a janitor.

I went to a magic show and the magician asked for my watch... He took the watch and then produced a doughnut... Guess what was in the doughnut? JAM!

Ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmm Brian. Ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

Knock Knock Who's there? 9/11 9/11 Who? You said you'd never forget.

What does an elephant and a red soda have in common? Neither collects stamps.

What do you call a giraffe driving a car?.. Your Imagination

Why could'nt Boris fit in with the other kids? His name was Boris.

You know what's funnier than 24? .... 9-11

Poop.

Why didn't the boomerang return? It hit a baby

Yo Mamma

A man walks into a bar. Inside he finds Hitler, his wife, and an angry badger. They are pleased to see him and they all relate to each other through their shared love of bocce ball.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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