Robert Muldoon: "Clever girl..." Velociraptor: "I appreciate your compliment, but I will still eat your face."

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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why cant ben cry, because i gorged his eyes out with a popsickle stick.....

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor who? *snicker* F*ck a duck.

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How many hours of sleep did Jimmy get last night? Zero, because he has insomnia. Jimmy got fired from his job today because of his lack of energy and motivation due to his disorder. His wife divorced Jimmy because he can no longer support her and their two kids.

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Q: A football coach walks into a bank. Why? A: Because one of his players is suffering from terminal cancer and he needs governmental funding for the team to play the big game against their rivals and to win, in hopes the kid will recover. Q: Why did the football coach go into the bank again? A: To receive more money to find a new running back.

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Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar.... Homosexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual pandas just have piece? Man 1: Were the hell did you come from? Homosexual Panda: My mother's uterus same as you, retard.

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Whats worse than the holocaust? WNBA

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? A stick.

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why did the small boy drop his ice cream ? because he has no hands

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Q.How do you scare an emo?? A.Run after them with plasters

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Why did the little boy chase after his ball? Because it rolled away

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RACIST JOKE Why did the racist cross the road? He wanted to get to the other side.

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Excuse me. Oh, would you mind hitting the 15th floor button for me? Thanks.

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Whats red and smells like Bacon. Bacon

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what do round tank toilets do? blow up CC

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Q: Why is it funny to laugh at gay men? A: They like men.

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What do bluejays and cardinals have in common? They both Were born during the Medevil period.

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What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? A park bench can support a family.

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darude- sandstorm

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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They see me rollin' They hatin' Patrolin they try to catch write a joke Try to catch me write a joke Try to catch me write a joke (tootle loo, I see you ;)

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An man was tested positive for HIV. He then called his girlfriend and told her she should get tested.

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What is grey and cannot fly? A parking lot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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