Why did the guy in the ferrari stop? -He hit the median at 100mph.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first koala. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game.

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What did the boy with no legs get for Christmas? A nice sweater.

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Roses are black, Violets are black, I'm blind.

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What's a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick

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What should you give your Italian plumber for a refreshment? Water, because he's probably working so hard that he's thirsty.

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knock knock who's there? THE ROCKET POWERED FIST!!

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A manly man drives up in a yellow bug, What do the girls think? They think its very manly! (;

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Why did the the chicken cross the road? So he wouldn't be late for his annual check up at the clinic across the street.

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Have you ever had Ugandan food? Neither have they.

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Peter charas threw a masterball at a level 20 Zubat!!!!!

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why did the baby fall down the stairs? i pushed it.

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Why did litltle Susie drop her ice cream? She got hit by a bus Knock knock Who's there Not Susie

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I was hungrey then i saw a man puke. Im still very hungrey. Then i threw up. Im not so hungrey

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Look through your peephole, you lazy bastard.

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So once upon a midnight dreery.... In a galaxy far far away that takes place in the past but resembles a technologically advanced future, an evil sith overlord took an innocent Jedi knight and turned him in a cybernetic killing machine. In the end, he dies

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AAAnd that did not totally send a rush of sweet endorphin's up my spine, I think myself of as really really blunt, I value individualism rather than complete assimilation, I think that, if people want to hear my opinion, they ask me, and if they want to hear what they want to hear, they can ask... Pff, anybody else. I end up insulting a lot of people literally asking for it, but moments like these make it all worth it. I am also extremely superstitious, the catchphra states "Grain of salt" so I wont take your comment completely... I am just screwing around...

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A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken a month off from working in their law firm. The mexican man, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. Alex, however never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

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Why did the weird alien jump everywhere? You probably don't want to know. If you learned why it jumped everywhere,you probably would make fun of it. I don't know if you know this, but aliens are sensitive. If you made fun of him, you probably would create World War 3:Humans VS Aliens.

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What's the meaning of life? I don't know.

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Q) What do you get when you cross a brown chicken with a brown cow? A) An abomination

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What do you get when u cross a owl and a bungy cord...........my ass

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Q: How do you stop a hobo from stealing your money A: You steal the hobo

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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