What do you call a handsome nerd? The name that is on his birth certificate.

why did the boy die? because he got shot

A horse, a duck, a pig, and a mus lim walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the mus lim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in Chicago. The bartender reminds the mus lim that he's keeping company with a swine, and the mus lim feels offense for the poor horse.

Everyone is different, but there are two of me, therefore I am unique. I have 72 different personalities, which all think, act and behave the same, all have my same name, but its still different to have such a thing eh? No I am not asking, I just added that weird little lightbulb symbol after "eh". People buy my book, its full of this nonsense... Its named "Are you left winged, or wrong winged" The book that has nothing to do with politics, and everything to do with politicians non existent sexlife! (seriously I had a book signing today... It was weird, people like stood in line twenty Signatures... AND PEOPLE ARE ALL GOING "HEY ARE YOU THAT GUY FROM HORSEHEAD?" Nero -WHO THE FUCK! IS THAT GUY ON HORSEHEAD?

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man returned and said, "My friend does not have a pulse and he is not breathing, so I stand by my prior assumption."

Your flying on a canoe, and one of the wheels breaks off. How many pancakes does it take to fix it? Trick question there is a gorilla on board.

what did the african boy get for christmas? what does his ethnicity or his place of origin have anything to do with what he gets for christmas

http://cache.deadspin.com/assets/resources/2008/04/Deer_mating2.jpg

I like my women like i like my coffee... with big titis

Chuck Norris walks into a bar, and asks for directions to the nearest Applebee's.

Why did the little girl keep running into things Because she was blind

what's the diferance between a boner and a lambroghini? I dont have a lambroghini

You're mom is so slutty, she has sex with many men.

If Waldo and Carmen Sandiego had a child it would be fictional.

What's better than winning the special Olympics? Getting laid at the special Olympics.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Orange ya glad i didn't say banana

a man paints himself yello shrinks himself and walks into a baber shop then he relizes that the sizers are yello so he gets cut up into shreds and dies. THE END!

Q: What's blue and smells like grass? A: Blue grass.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Who. Who, Who? Shut up you damn owl, I'm trying to deliver a pizza.

my girlfriend had a weird fetish, she used to dress up like herself and act like a bitch all the time.

if life gives you lemons. squeeze one into your moms eye.

Hey! You wanna' hear a joke? Black Freedom

why did the irishman leave the bar he had to go to his sons birthday party

What the last thing that went through Osama's mind? A bullet

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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