Yo mama's so fat, that when she jumped, gravity pushed her back to the floor!

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what does hi = good by cause person doesn't like you.

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Ed has spent all his days on the farm. It was the farm of his father and grandfather before him; long have they prospered from the fruits of this land. He has a wife and 3 beautiful children, all of whom live happily on the farm. Ed still manages to keep an active social life, and has lots of interesting friends. His best friend is Moe. As a young man, Ed had spent a few years living in the city for his studies. Moe lives in the city, and he knows Ed from College. One day, Moe came out to the farm to have lunch with his old friend. After lunch, he and Ed took a walk around the farm. They passed by the horses, the chickens, the pigs and finally they came to the cows. Ed looked at Moe, and he saw that he was focused intently on a single cow. "What's the matter, Moe?" he asked. "That," Moe said, "is one skinny cow."

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What is white and can fly? A fridge that can't fly.

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ProX hacker JazZ Has aids hahahaha

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You: That was awful. Me: You know what else is awful? You: What? Me: This joke.

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What did Batman say to When they were heading to the Batmobile Robin get in the batmobile.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? THE CHICKEN!

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Two Muffins are in an oven the first Muffin says "whew it's hot in here." The other Muffin turns around and yells "Holy shit! I can talk too!"

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse says "my wife has cancer"

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Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witnesses, can we have a moment of your time?

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Besides the kama-sutra, what is the most popular sex position in India? 68 and 88. Moral: Mutation people... mutation... use your imagination.., Still gotta feel a bit of envy/admiration, it is known as the happiest nation of the world, with a happiness rate with a constant well over 80 percent, and that is FAR over any other nation.

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Like this if you want people to stop asking to have their jokes liked.

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Your mother is so stupid because as a child, she was unable to keep up with what was being taught as she unfortunately had a learning disability.

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whats worse than a pile of dead babies?...... A carrot

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Your mother is so ugly, her genes were passed down through two generations, and now your children are of a similar caliber of ugliness. I'm so sorry.

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what did the boy say when his friend was having a panic attack? "don't panic!" rather earnestly in the hope that his friend's breathing returned to normal as panic attacks can be very uncomfortable and place too great a strain upon the cardio and respiratory functions.

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Orange. Orange Who? No, this is Homeland Security. We have raised the current terrorism threat level to Orange, which means there is a high risk of terrorist attacks. Please report any suspicious behavior.

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I just got robbed by an invisible man!!!!

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Q. How do you punish Helen Keller? A. Rearrange the furniture in her room

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What did the raped girl say to the doctor? Nothing she was dead on arrival.

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Q: How to fit 10 babies in a suitcase? A: By blender Q: How to get the babies out of the suitcase? A: Using a straw.

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What do you call a black and white ruler? Barack Obama.

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what did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, They just waved.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops