what is red and looks like a bucket? A red bucket Waht is blue and looks like a bucket? (99% of the time they will say "a blue bucket") No, a red bucket in disguise!

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Maybe we simply need to keep the door open, but one cannot bring happiness to others, until one is happy oneself. Do I change something within you Red?

thumb_up thumb_down +19

why did Susie fall of the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who`s there? not Susie

thumb_up thumb_down +19

This is a haiku. Not a very good haiku, But still a haiku.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Q: What do sleeping pills and coffee have in common? A: Absolutely nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +19

How do you make a white girl commit suicide? Bully her.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Sigh, at times like this I begin to ponder what I am doing with my life. I do not look that much like some anime character thingie, she is awfully cute for a anime character though.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Walt dies in breaking bad.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did the blonde die? She was slurped up by a 1,000 foot anteater.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What does "Fiat" stand for? "Fabbrica Italiana Automobili Torino."

thumb_up thumb_down +19

"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "Red." "Red who?" "Red any good books lately?" Suddenly, the séance lost credibility.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did the baker turn off the oven? He had run out of business

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did Sally fall off the swing set? because she had no arms. --- Knock, Knock Whos there? Not Sally.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

How did the blonde trip the brunette? She stuck out her foot

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What do you call a black person flying a plane? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

what did the chicken say to the other chicken? nothing, they dont talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

i went to the bar. soon after i entered the bar i got kicked out. why? becuase i'm seventeen.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Q: What did the cop do when he saw a mexican in his car? A: Nothing, he was looking in a mirror.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What do you call it, when a jew makes fun of a black guy? Racism.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What do you call an animal that is blue, fluffy and lives in the arctic? I don't know and that's why I'm asking you.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? Roast Beef is a solid and Pea Soup is a liquid

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?".

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Three men are stranded in a small rowboat. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. It became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops