So there's this guy, and he's trying to screw in a lightbulb, right? Well, he did it. Hoorah. His wife was proud.

Why didn't the woman cross the road? She died from breast cancer.

A pony goes to the doctor saying his throat hurts, the doctor sais "oh I know, your a little hoarse". The pony replies, no I'm not ass-hole I have strep throat.

Nero, listen, do not try to imply that you created the Iron man method, that was developed by many people over the duration of many years in the former underground society. You seem far too educated to be the savage you claim to be, if I told you that our people will do the uttermost to see if we can fix that eye of yours and succeed, will you forgive my failure and imperfections as a leader? Look at it this way, I am a leader, not a ruler, what my followers do is up to them, but if they cannot understand that they have to pay the consequences behind their actions, they have no place within the order, as for the expression "my order" it is simply what my many followers like for me to say, not because they are unwilling to take responsibility, but as a token of praise. Our articulations and means of expressing desire and such are very much the same, have you ever been part of our order?

Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the slaughter house.

your mom is so ugly that she was made fun of in highschool so much that she now has social issues and a fear of close relationships which is why she left you and your father at age 5

"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. And that's when I found out my Uncle Ted was a cross-dresser.

If Spongebob lives in Bikini Bottom, Where is Bikini Top?

What's big and black? An ant i lied about in being big

What did i say to the stupid person? Your Stupid.

How can you tell if your roomate is gay? If he gets an erection when you have anal sex with him.

How do you steal candy from a baby? You ask nicely.

why did a bunch of black kids play in a pile of leafs? to have fun :)

you know why Michael J Fox makes the best milkshakes? no... but his milkshakes brings all the boys to the yard

Yo mama so fat.

Your Mom The End.

Why did Rainey fall off the swing? She had no hair.

Q:How do u kill a butcher A: Kill its family

What is worde then swallowing a slipper? Swallowing a granny to catch the slipper

Q: What's black and hangs from a tree? A: A tire swing.

What's the difference between an orange? A bicycle because a vest doesn't have any sleeves.

What happened to the chicken when it crossed the road? Nothing because the cars that almost hit it swerved off the road.

what did the pizza say to the bread? nothing pizza cant talk

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Reading the dumbass things that people come up with as an answer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...