Roses are blue Violets are polka dot I suck at rhyming Pandas

Why does Michael J. Fox have a good handshake? He has a firm grip

Q: How do you make an mail man cry? A: Take his car and run over his family.

what is Rebecca black's favorite restaurant? Ruby Tuesdays

What did the cat say when someone pointed out that cats can't talk? Meow.

What do you call an Arab guy flying a plane? A pilot.

T-rex: If you're happy and you know it clap your hands, oh...

It's good to be a scientist and great to be a biologist. However, it is never okay to be a scientologist.

Why did the blonde stare at the juice carton? Because a man was pointing a shotgun at her and would kill her if she didn't do it.

What do you call a Black man sweeping the floor? A janitor.

what did the boy who liked trucks get for his birthday? POOP

two muffins are in a oven the one muffin says jee its hot in here and the other muffin says wow a talking muffin

A mormon walks into a bar.

Knock Knock. Who's there? I don't know, you answer the door.

Why little Susie often molested as a child? She was probably a good-looking child.

What is red and has wheels? Grass, I lied about it being red and having wheels.

Knock! Knock! Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock! Knock! Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock! Knock! Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad this joke is over?

What starts with F and ends in UCK? The F word but im not allowed to say it.

What happened when the white man went to Nigiria? He turned gray.

Q. How can you find true love? A. Google it...duh

This blind man read my mind the other day. I swear, it's like he has a 5th sense!

Why cant African children read? While there are many contributing factors the largest would probably be the lack of a standardized education system mainly due to the logistical factors involved in reaching so many wide spread communities. Also the current economic climate and general disregard for civilians by the governments in these area would suggest that the states' focus would be on other issues besides the welfare of their citizens, this is probably similar to other countries in similar situations such as middle eastern, eastern european, and latin and south america. Then again, not really being educated on this issue in almost any way, has probably contributed to a broad generalization, and so the premise of this joke is most likely flawed in any case.

haha

If Steve has 5 apples and gives Jenny 2, it is obvious they aren't eating oranges.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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