How would I re-arrange the alphabet? I would place P in your butt...

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When Geese fly in their 'V' formation, why is one line bigger than the other? There's more geese in that line.

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What did the jew do to his waiter? He explained how he had provided excellent service and left a very generous tip to applaud his efforts.

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why are there so many homeless asians with squinty eyes, they cant find their way back home

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A man walks into a meat shop. Man: I bet you $20 you can't reach the meat on the top shelf. Butcher: The steaks are too high

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hating his life and his job, the man leaves work early and while he is in the elavator he has thoughts about killing himself after returning to his apartment he turns on the TV and grabs his gun out of the drawer. sitting in a chair with a gun to his head he looks at the TV and realizes that his office building has just been hit by a 747 piloted by Al-Quida members. Suddenly the man realizes that maybe he has something to live for and decides not to kill himself.

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What's green and eats rocks? A green rock eater What's purple and eats rocks? It hasn't been discovered by science yet...

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why did the chicken cross the road? because yo mama so fat and the pig ate my poop

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Why did the Mexican cross the road? Because he needed to go to work to help pay for his dying daughter's cancer treatment

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Nero, sure you are okay?

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Whats green? Mountain Dew.

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Why did a little kid's mom let go of his hand? John Wilks Booth shot her

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A elephant drowns when it was swimming, why did this happen? Who cares its already dead!

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What do you call a dog riding a bicycle? An talented dog.

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A British man walks into a dentist's office.

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What happens when you put the batteries in BACKWARDS in the Energizer Bunny? Nothing. Nothing happens when you insert batteries backwards

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What do you call a dog? A cat. What do you call a cat? A banana.

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Whats worse than cold feet? getting your feet chopped off.

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Why did Hellen Keller drive off of the cliff? Because she is a woman.

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A clown walking down the steet, trips -Ryan Vallee

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PROS = good things CONS = bad thing So, if PROgress is a good thing...then why is the US government call CONgress?

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How do you confuse a bus driver? Go invisible and throw bananas at him

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What do you get when you cross a penis with a dinosaur? A dicklodocus.

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What did the Jew do before the movie? He turned off his cell phone.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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