What starts with the letter P and ends with O-R-N? Popcorn

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How do you kill a blue elephant? With a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a red elephant? Spray paint it blue then shoot it with a blue elephant gun

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what's worse than dropping half your sandwich? Getting hit in the face with a sledgehammer

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A black man comes home from work.

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Guess what my nephew said yesterday? oh wait, i forgot hes dead..

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I farted and it smells like rotten ham with melted cottage cheese now dislike this please.

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A man sits down to dinner with his wife And she notifies him that their 8 year old son just died

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Q: Why is there never sun beaming at the castle? A: Because the castle is full of knights.

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Knock, knock. Whose there? A Mountain Lion wait...what

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What's the difference between a Obama and a drug-dealer? Obama is the president and a drug-dealer has lost his life to the awful streets.

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If your dying how would you avoid getting eaten alive by sharks or rip to shreds by a T-Rex? Fall on a sword

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Your parents are dead, and so will you.

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Hey, I just met you And this is Crazy I have Amnesia I like trains.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Houlocaust. What's worse than the Houlocaust? Nothing, the Haulocaust was one of the most horrible instances of inhumanity in recorded history.

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With all due respect, I do underestimate myself, there is not a single person I know that has not told me that, but if I wanted to, I would not even had to make the effort to have you removed, hell I had to pull favors and owe people things in order to keep you safe. I could have said the rest of you, but had I not known you, had you not been one of my co-workers back then, I would not have gone to the extremes that i did, you are beautiful, but what does that have to do with anything? Do you think that if I did not know you I would go "that one is sexy, release her?" Even if I did, I do not have authority, I work for them.

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You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse replies "I'm dying of AIDS so I guess I'm feeling a little sorry for myself"

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How many unicorns does it take to change a light bulb? 17. 11 if its Tuesday.

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What was wrong with the man watching a black and white television program? He wasn't watching a black and white television program at all-he actually had color blindness.

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What did the doctor say to his patient? You have AIDS.

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Whats red, black and brown? My anus after a Friday night

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Where did sally go during the bombing? Everywhere.

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What do you call a black male teacher? A: A Teacher .

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what do you call a blonde skeleton in the closet? last years hide and go seek champion

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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