Did you hear about the young couple that confused K-Y jelly with window caulking? All their windows fell out.

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a blonde walks into a drycleaning store to get her clothes and on her way out the empoyee behind her says come again and then the blonde says shut up u nosy bitch its just toothpaste this time!!!

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What did the little black boy get for Christmas? Hopefully something nice.

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Why did George Bush climb the Statue of Liberty? I'm not sure, as this incident is not covered in any of the myriad books written about his administration.

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(Pretend you're an orphan.) Knock knock. Who's there? Not your parents.

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Your mother is so fat that I suggest she should pay a visit to the nutritionist so they can work out a dieting plan together to prevent weight-related heart problems in the near future.

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why was the pen mad at the pencil? it wasnt. objects don't have feelings

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why did the bus roll down the hill? Children were playing in the street.

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A woman walks into the kitchen to see her husband cooking dinner because gender stereotypes have been dead for years.

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What's funnier than 24? Nothing, 24 is just a number. There's is nothing humorous about it. Go away.

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Yeah, Eliza, its me, its so strange, you are the only one I remember from highschool, I was worried you had forgotten about me, anyway, yeah type as if you where speaking to him, and dont worry, I know I could not keep a secret back then, and I told Nero, so and he promised me he would kindly break my fingers if I told anyone, besides I dont do that anymore trust me.

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What did the boy with a crippled arm get for his birthday? A guitar.

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Why did Chuck Norris start crying? Because he was in a coma

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What do you do if you walk outside and see your t.v. floating in the lawn in the middle of the night? Go back inside.

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An SQL query walks into a bar, sees two tables and asks if it can join them.

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A man didn't feel well so he went to the toilet. He had explosive diahrria, then felt better.

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A guy walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The guy didn't respond because he was deaf.

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Whats happening when you see your TV floating at night? You are probably suffering from some sort of mental disorder which causes spontaneous hallucinations and should seek medical help before the condition worsens.

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Inspirational speaker: "You can judge a man by the way he treats those who can do nothing for him." Me: "Hitler loved dogs."

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What do you get when you run from Long Island to New Mexico? Tired.

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An irish man stumbles out of a bar.

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How would a camel lick its own tongue It doesn't It actually gets karate chopped by Bob Sager.

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Why did the man have no friends? He stabbed an innocent woman and is now rotting in prison.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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