why do ducks have webbed feet? to stomp out fires. why do elephants have flat feet? to stomp out the burining ducks.

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You might be a redneck if you hate your father and you live in a trailer

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A Jew, a Christian, and a Muslim walk into a bar. A good time was had by all, until closing time.

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yo mamma's so retarded that shes a potato

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-Knock! Knock! -Who's there? -Bob. Is Brian's here? -Wrong adress. Brian's home is the first one at your right. -Oh sorry. Have a nice day.

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What looks like poo but is rainbow colored? Rainbow colored poo.

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Why do cows have bad hand writing? because they don't have thumbs

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What's funny about a small child with no arms, no legs? Nothing.. Nothing at all.

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What's white, black and can't fit through a man hole? A nun with a spear in their head

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Who doesn't love finding money in your pocket when you go to put your pants on? a rape victim

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What has four wheels and flies? A pile of poop that's on four wheels.

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What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo

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What do you call a guy with alot of money? A rich guy.

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Cigarettes are a lot like hamsters. Perfectly harmless until you put them in your mouth and catch them on fire.

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Why didn't Susan go to school on show-and-tell day? Because she's dead.

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How do you get a bunch of baby guts out of a bathtub? A lot of tostitos.

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Why doesn't Charlie Sheen take showers? Because he spends too much time on MySpace.

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There was a blonde driving a car but she was late to a meeting so she started speeding but then a police officer pulls her over. The officer asked the blonde "Do you know how fast you were going?" to which the blonde responded "Yes, I am late to a meeting" so the police gives a ticket for speeding and she ends up going late to her meeting.

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a dog and a duck went out for a meal they both ordered lobster and enjoyed the night.

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A duck walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "What'll it be?" The duck says that he should get his doctor on the phone because his hullucinations are getting worse.

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Your mother is so fat.

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My wife is going to the Caribbean Jamaica? No, St Lucia

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Why am I writing this? Cuz I am eating babies alive right now!

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What did the Insomniac, Dyslexic Priest do? He stayed up all night wondering if there really is a Dog.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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