why did the man hop everywhere? He only had one leg

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what did the man say after he fell off the cliff nothing, he's dead

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what do you call a man who is addicted to alcohol... an alcoholic

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Why do woman cook dinner? Because their husband has 6 jobs and is trying to support his family so she does a part and cooks dinner.

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Why didn't the chicken not get across the road? Cause it's head got shot off by some drunk asshole

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What do you get when you mix a dog and a fish? A hot fillet.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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What is better than a Beer? Two Beers.

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What do you call a green blur in the sky? Super pickle?

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I believe if Floyd Mayweather fought Muhammad Ali I believe it would be a close fight but Floyd would win. Because Ali has Parkinson's

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why did the man drop his razor? he had a seizure.

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yo mommas so fat she heard it was chilly out so she ran inside and got a bowl

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Your Mommas so scary slender is afraid of her -_-

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* two sisters are making yo mama jokes* * mom turns around* mom: Hey yo mama so stupid ... sister one: ummmm.... sister two: sure thats not you?

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What's worse than breastfeeding a wolverine? Force-breastfeeding a wolverine.

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How many cops does it take to change a light bulb? None. They just beat it for being black.

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Q: What's black and blue and is all over Timmy's mother? A: The bruises his father gave her when he came home drunk.

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I can't believe they been together for 16 years!! Who? Deez Nutz!

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Roses are white, Violets are white, holy shit i can see the light.

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How do you blindfold an Asian person? With a blindfold

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How do you spell orange? O-R-A-N-G-E-U-D-U-M-B-A-S-S

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Why do black guys have ashy elbows? Because of 9/11

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Q: What has the exact same colors as the gay flag but are sometimes hilarious? A: Clowns.

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So a guy is on his way to work and he nearly gets hit by a bus. He sticks his middle finger up at the bus driver but a couple seconds later he realized that it was the same bus he was supposed to get on so he apologized to the bus driver and got on the bus. He was 15 minutes late for the 420th time this week so he was fired from his job and went back home. On his way home he was not allowed on the bus because he left his oyster card somewhere so he had to walk home. 69 minutes later he arrives home to his wife and kids. What did the man say to his wife when he got back home? "Hi."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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