WHERE WAS THE DECLARATION OF INDEPENTENTS AT THE BOTTEM!!!

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A blond, brunette, and a red head are stranded on an island. They find a genie, who tells them each one can have one wish. They all wish for the same thing, to be back home with their families.

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What did the southern uncle say to his nephew when he woke up? Good morning, son.

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Q) What do you call a black man swinging from a tree? A) A very silly man as it is potentially dangerous

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Roses are black. Violets are black. Everything is black. I'm Helen Keller.

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what did one tree say to the other spruce up actually nothing because trees can't talk

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Why are black people afraid of chainsaws? Because chainsaws are powerful machines, capable of dismemberment and death when wielded by someone who wishes to cause harm

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What is the best thing about dating a slut? You can return her at Build-a-Hoe Workshop.

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Why cant white guys jump? Well that would be wrong because some can. Have you seen Blake Griffen?

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How do you stop a clown from smiling? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

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jordan godfrey is good looking lolololol

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What happens to a fish with no fin on the right side? It repeatedly swims in a circle.

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Chuck Norris gets punched in the face.

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What is the last thing to go through a flies head before it hits a windshield. Nothing because flies aren't capable if rational thought.

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Christianity.

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A man walks in to a bar, what does he say? Ouch.

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Q. How many blonds do you know? A. I don't know any blonds, but are you perhaps talking about blondes? Because if so, I still don't know any.

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whats in a red suit with a white beard and jolly......st.nick jerking of and blowwing a load in your stocking while taking a shit on you coffee table before theen hanging it back up over the fire place

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Q: What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable? A: The wheel chair.

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Knock knock Who's there A gorilla A gorilla who? A gorilla is a ground-dwelling, predominantly herbivorous ape that inhabit the forests of central Africa. The eponymous genus Gorilla is divided into two species: the eastern gorillas and the western gorillas, and either four or five subspecies. They are the largest living primates by physical size. The DNA of gorillas is highly similar to that of humans, from 95–99% depending on what is counted, and they are the next closest living relatives to humans after the chimpanzees and bonobos.

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What is the difference between Acenaphthoquinone and Acetoguanamine? I don't know...

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What do you call Helena… A Shady palm tree

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what did the little boy say to his sibling? dat not funny!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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